Nobody’s happy all the time. All relationships go through bad patches and down stages.
But if you’ve entered the so-so zone, thinking your relationship’s not bad enough to leave but are not enthusiastic about the future, then it might be an indication that you’re not as compatible as you thought.
Relationship experts agree that it may be time to go when you only share one or two things in common, a hobby, sex or the dog. You are doing all the work to solve the relationship’s problems. Your partner is unwilling to change or compromise. They don’t think you have any problems even though you’ve confessed you’re not happy. He or she treats you badly. You love them but don’t like them much.
It sounds bizarre, but love isn’t a reason to stay together. You can love your partner on one level but still not be suited long term. If you’ve been with a person a long time, of course you still care desperately about them and have lots of shared history and good times. But if your head tells you you’re not only both moving in entirely different directions but very happy about where you’re headed, it’s time to kiss each other tenderly and change the relationship to friendship.
Read Obi’s question..Dear Bunmi,
I’m currently in a relationship and fancy my boyfriend to bits. I met him toward the end of last year and he says he loves me too. My relationship before then was a big dent in my self-esteem.
Despite my ex’s professed love for me, he didn’t hesitate to drop me when he found a new lover. Was I blind or was he the rat? I didn’t see the break-up coming and I would love to know the things to look out for when a relationship is not working.
Obi, by e-mail.
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